Why is it we make all these plans to achieve a goal, but rarely do we focus on the power of habits. Planning is great but if you’re like me, you probably plan your week and then go off script the moment Monday roles around?
“We become what we repeatedly do.” ~Sean Covey.
Do you want to be a happier? Healthier? A great role model for your little one?
If you’re a mamma, my guess is “Yes!” so read on…
Last night I was chatting with Ronnie’s daughter, sharing how my much life changes with a baby. Of course there is a lot to be happy about and there is a lot I have grieved. Being a Mamma brings a whole new identity and one I am getting to know and fall in love with. As I get to know my new and norm (and the new me), I want to make a concerted effort to consciously choose what this looks like and who I will be. It’s far to easy to fall back on childhood or societal programming. Even the word Motherhood can be both liberating or exhausting, depending on the way you look at it.
The only way to consciously create the best version of yourself is through the habits you live by. Habits will either build you or destroy you. The choice is entirely yours.
But what habits do I pick?
When I started getting my house in order and decided what was most important to me, my focus wasn’t about achieving a certain thing. My focus was about fulfillment and experience. The thought of having some rigid, measurable, actionable goal felt exhausting.
My commitment to these goals has been great, and then not so great. The reason – I was still holding onto old programming. Let’s take the goal of body – each time I would make a plan to move forward I would automatically go into the old way of losing weight (I use to do competitive dance at a reasonably high level and let’s face it the world of dance is not overly healthy). Strict diet, crazy exercise routine (from day one – no building up and getting fit), injury, sit on couch, eat comfort food, stay up late, get annoyed, re-set goals and so the cycle would start again. ENOUGH ALREADY!
Design habits to create a lifestyle change
I wasn’t looking at this as a lifestyle change, rather a diet I would do until I lost the weight and then I could go back to “normal”. All of this seems so crazy as I write this blog because my habits are here to recreate and elevate my new normal while allowing me to release the toxic habits I’ve got going on, both mentally and physically. When choosing habits there are five key areas to consider:
- Does this habit bring improvement to myself and those around me?
- Is this habit in alignment with the highest expression of who I am and who I’m becoming?
- Is this habit something I can stick with? Do I have to adjust it so I can make it stick?
- Does this habit help me create the life I want to live?
- Is this habit something I would be proud of? Is this habit something I would want my baby to reflect back at me in his own behaviours?
How do I stick to my habits?
Great question! (why thank you – I asked it).
It was 4am and I couldn’t sleep. I find when I’m awake at silly o’clock, my mind wonders to a time where I was part of a ‘5am club’. Each morning we would meet at the gym, do a workout, live stream to our coaching clients, then proceed to have coffee and debate all things about the world. This time was a happy time. Currently I’m part of the Austin’s 5am club, but that is another story.
As I was enjoying the memories of my 5am club it dawned it wasn’t the 5am start I loved, it was the habit club we had created. During our gym sessions, each day we would set little challenges for each other to do and be better. Having this habit club made life fun and it also provided a sense of community and accountability in aligning the day to something great. My day’s didnt roll into one another, they had a clear start, middle and finish.
Sticking to something takes way more than will power. Of course, motivation, having a strong why are key ingredients but if you really want to make it stick you cant get better than a good does of accountability. The reason I could wake up at 4:30am to be at the gym by 5am (no matter what the weather was doing) was because I had a buddy waiting for me on the other side. I was part of a habit Club.
Urban Mamma – the ultimate habit club
Having a baby makes it hard to meet up with people at a set time daily, however this blog is a great place to create a habit club. Each week and day I am going to post about the habits I want to live by.
The way it will work
- Each Sunday – decide on the weekly habit
- Each day – post about the habit and stay accountable both on UM and Instagram
If you are wanting to make a change, why not join in and build your own healthy happy habits?